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User’s Guide to the Japanese Specialists of The Tops: Version 1.00.00 – Part 1 of about 1000

Posted by BigDummyKenny on January 22, 2010

Everyone knows it. There is no debating the fact: The Tops has a bad reputation on the internet.

The conventional wisdom of the Self Professed Masters of the Universe is “don’t waste your time” because the same bottom of the barrel, no visa, no work permit, struggling to keep their heads above water drug addicts and Cambodian girls who fill Nana parking lot also populate The Tops (and don’t ask why I call it “The” Tops – I think it just sounds cool). The conventional wisdom of the Self Professed Masters of the Universe is The Tops is a stinky, sticky run-down past it’s prime establishment serving watered down drinks with no future. The conventional wisdom of the….wait, lost my train of thought.

Oh yea…the conventional wisdom of the Self Professed Masters of the Universe will tell you the place to go for Japanese Specialist’s is Soi Thaniya or Thermae. The conventional wisdom of the Self Professed Masters of the Universe will tell you the first place to go for Fresh Produce is the SWSM or Thermae and the last place to go is The Tops.

Nothing could be further from the truth.

The Tops is world unto itself–unique and full of new adventures waiting to happen for those willing to leave their comfort zone and try something new. Instead of wasting two minutes of your life and walk wayyyyyyy down Sukhumvit away from Asoke and Soi Cowboy to hang out at the Thermae you could already be drooling over the fresh produce awaiting you at The Tops.

The Tops is located in the basement below Robinson’s. You can easily get to The Tops by taking the BTS to Asoke or the MRT to Sukhumvit and walking away from Sukhumvit on the same side of the street where the MRT and BTS are connected by the escalators.

The advantages of The Tops over other Japanese specialist places like Thermae are countless. Where do you go if you find yourself wanting some fresh produce at 8AM? What about 3PM? Soi Thaniya and The Thermae have limited hours of operation and most the time you will either find the place closed or be disappointed with the selection of Fresh Produce. That’s not a problem at The Tops. The Tops is happening 24/7 and there is always plenty of Fresh Produce to be found.

Just take a look at these photos taken on a Thursday morning in front of Thermae and Tops:

The Scene at Thermae

The Scene at Tops

Tell me, which place would you rather shop for Japanese specialists and fresh produce. As you can see from the last photo, the Japanese men are already waiting outside The Tops for the latest delivery of fresh produce from not only Thailand, but around the world. They understand the value of the scene at The Tops and now you can too.

(continued in Part 2)


7 Responses to “User’s Guide to the Japanese Specialists of The Tops: Version 1.00.00 – Part 1 of about 1000”

  1. I’m a bit confused. I think the reason you call it Tops is because that is the name of the supermarket downstairs. There used to be a nice food court downstairs as well, but it has been under remodel for sometime.
    Fresh produce, yes,most supermarkets have fresh produce.
    Interesting opening use of the “Lexicon”. SEO

  2. Man, I am stupid. I just now realized this is a joke. I am dense today 🙂

  3. realdaffyduck said

    So, I’m in Bangkok right now, and based on this article I rushed to *TeH ToPs*, hungry for fresh produce — and all I found was some fresh lettuce, and some japanese guys lounging around…



  4. BigDummyKenny said

    @ realdaffyduck – There are so many Japanese men going to The Tops for fresh produce that it’s possible they ran out. Certainly if you were to go back you would find fresh produce to your liking as will be demonstrated in Part 2.


  5. I’ll be looking forward to it.

  6. Fanta said

    Excellent! This is kinda like NotNotStickmanbangkok!! In our forlorn and fallen ProMo condition, ‘nightlife’ blogs pop up like post-apocalyptic Hiratake mushrooms (available at The Tops I’m told)not so much to talk about nightlife but the ‘nightlife’ talked about by others or others ‘talking’ about the ‘nightlife’. To honor this trend, I’m off to masturbate whilst watching simulated sex on my iPhone in Star of Light whilst eating a lettuce from The Tops. I’ll be sure to have an ‘orgasm’.

  7. BigDummyKenny said

    @ Fanta – Correct, hiratake mushrooms are indeed available at The Tops. You are clearly a man who knows people who know where to shop for fresh produce. To avoid chafing, I suggest that in addition to the lettuce you also purchase a freshly baked loaf of bread in which to wrap your willie.

    Butter or other ‘spread’ should not be required as I am sure your star of light princess will enjoy the natural flavoring from your origami-sm.

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